Sunday, May 27, 2012

Just the way you are....

Add weight and add on sex appeal!
Vintage ads ROCK!

Throughout history the image of woman has changed. At times a plump woman was seen as attractive and other times a woman with a boyish figure was see as attractive. Today, I feel as though the image of women is distorted and very confusing. Perhaps its the fault of the porn industry run by men who view only blond and busty women as attractive. Of perhaps it was women themselves who bought into the fantasies of men and desired to make those fantasies a reality.

Honestly, I know men. I was raised by one and I have an older brother. My husband is a man (duh) and one of my best friends is one. And now I am the mother of two sons. So yes, most men like to see a fit women but most don't like just one type of woman. Most men like women of all sizes, obviously preferring one over the other but at the end of the day most men enjoy a women who is confidant and who takes care of herself no matter her size.

We are all shapes and sizes....

So is it women themselves that create these insane and unlivable expectations? Look-when you get older your body CHANGES. When you have a child, your body CHANGES. These are two things that women cannot really stop. Oh boy have they tried but in reality a women's body IS going to change. You are going to get bigger hips, you will loss and gain weight at different times, your skin will change, your hair will too. 

Pregnancy is NO joke! It is a huge undertaking. You feed and help grow a HUMAN BEING for nine months and then that human comes out into the world. And NO you will NOT have a flat belly afterwards because for a while your uterus has to go down to normal size and all the skin that stretched for that baby to grow has to go down as well. Some women bounce back better than others and that also depends on age, how much they gained during pregnancy, and the kind of pregnancy they had. 

Preggie and chic~ullamaaria

If a women is bearing multiple children or having a pregnancy every year or so it will be more difficult to bounce back. But here's the thing-once you're pregnant your shape will alter so why pressure yourself to "bounce" back? Instead of putting that pressure on yourself why not figure out how you can continue to be healthy for yourself and your family. If you loose the weight or not-get healthy and get happy.

Today, my friend Jennifer from I know, right? who was a guest blogger on a blog called Amber's Mouthwash wrote a post that just hit home to me. Lately I have been battling some negative thoughts creeping into my head. The past five years have been life changing for me in every way because I became a mother in 2007. Not only that but in four years time I became a mother of three! Then to top it off I am not in my twenties. So all of that rolled into one-although I have been modeling to express my beauty and learn to embrace all of these changes, sometimes I just shake my head and ask myself, "where am I in the midst of all these changes?" 

A photo of me, as I am.

I don't want to bounce back-I just want to continue to be best ME I can and that's that. Why can't the world at large see all the beauty that is woman and not try to destroy that beauty? Why can't women be happy for each other? Why can't women uplift other women and not tear them down?

Now here is what I ask of  you. Take a moment and ask yourself are you healthy and happy? If so, encourage others to do so and cheer them on. If not, find ways to achieve that goal in a healthy manner. The pressures that are placed on women I think are placed by other women and if we took out the time to celebrate ourselves perhaps we will be able to celebrate others.



  1. This is a fantastic post, Bunny!

    You make another great point: every pregnancy is different, because of so many factors. I've only known two mothers who bounced back into perfect shape after giving birth: one was my cousin, who had a child at 16. Her doctor even commented that she would be back down to her usual 100 pounds in no time b/c teenage girls have "dream pregnancies" (yes, that was the term used!) because they are so young. The other mother was my former editor who had her first kid at 42. And I believe she bounced back so quickly because she has always been a super active person (she's spent the past 20 plus years as a marathon runner and fitness instructor, so she's always been a stick). Those are exceptions!

    I bet most of the women who judge other women on their weight are either girls who have never experienced pregnancy, women who are unhealthily obsessed with being thin, or simply women who have such low self-esteem themselves, they have to pubicly hate on others.

  2. I couldnt agree more. I think if more women were happy they would treat other women accordingly. Finding that inner peace inside yourself and accepting the changes that inevitably will come to us all is challenging but so worth the effort!! xox

  3. This is a great post and I hope you don't mind that I linked back to it here:

  4. You are a beautifull woman, just enjoy your life.


  5. Bunny, you are a dear. I agree that we need to love ourselves and be happy with who we are. I have always been more on the plump size and decided long ago that pleasantly plump was not only fine, but also very pretty. It is very endearing how children love the plumpness of their mother.

    I am not sure whose fault it is that women have so much pressure on them to be “perfect”, but I believe that women should love and encourage other women.

    :) Hope


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